Konbinis Are Churches

I was living on FamilyMart rice balls and low blood sugar dreams. Tokyo nights too hot to sleep and too cold to stay awake. It’s always 3:47 a.m. when you walk into a konbini. The neon light like a kiss from a dying god. The buzz of the fridges like the sigh of someone who’s given up. Meet me at the 7-Eleven by the tracks. She brought a can of Strong Zero and an open wound. Konbinis are churches. Sacred spaces where nobody prays but everyone kneels. Bent before microwave ramen, counting coins. The salaryman, suit crumpled like a used cigarette box. The girl with smeared lipstick, eyeliner like bruises. The boy in a school uniform who’s not going home tonight.

I stood in front of the refrigerated drinks like it was an altar. Pocari Sweat, lemon chu-hi, cold coffee in PET bottles. I bought a rice ball with salmon, a pack of melon bread, and a lighter I didn’t need. My hands were shaking. I liked the way they shook. Made me feel alive, or close to it. Outside, the rain tasted like metal and regret. I sucked it off my lips and watched people slide through the streets like ghosts. There’s a konbini every few blocks, like veins pumping sugar and trash into the city’s bloodstream. Every one of them the same. Open 24/7, eyes never blinking. I can lose myself in them. Not in a romantic way. In the way people vanish into cracks, forgotten until they rot.

We sat under the flickering sign, plastic bags between us, fingers greasy from karaage. I bought condoms and a manga I didn’t understand. She bought cough syrup and a toothbrush. We were both lying. The konbini is where you go when you have nowhere else. When your apartment’s too small, too quiet, too full of memory. When your body wants something. Salt, sugar, heat, nicotine. You know it won’t fix anything, but you go anyway. Because the lights are always on. Because the shelves are always full. Because the world ends softly, one plastic bag at a time. Let’s stay here forever, she said. Sure. But we both knew, morning was coming. And nothing golden ever stays.