December Again

December 1st. World AIDS Day. I remember MTV making these awareness campaigns about it, back when MTV actually cared about something beyond ratings. That’s pretty much the only decent thing the channel ever did.

I don’t know anyone with AIDS. It’s abstract for me—something from school, something you see in those awareness campaigns. But the danger is real. It’s present in every casual choice.

You’re at a party and someone’s attractive and things happen. You’re drunk, or horny, or both, and you’re thinking about right now, not about the next ten years. Sometimes you pause and do the smart thing. Sometimes you don’t.

The thing is, I don’t really think about it. Not until December 1st shows up again. For a few minutes I’m aware that AIDS exists, that it’s untreatable, that the choices I’ve made could have ended very differently. Then it fades. Then the next December rolls around and I’m reminded again that I’ve been lucky.