The Cartman Principle

I keep thinking about Eric Cartman, which is weird because he’s a murderous racist sociopath. But I can’t stop watching how he operates. He’s the only character in South Park who actually accomplishes anything. Everyone else is trapped in the same loop, constrained by the rules that keep them in place. Cartman doesn’t recognize that the rules exist.

He’s missing the brake that stops the rest of us. That makes him monstrous. It also makes him effective in a way that’s almost admirable if you can compartmentalize the monstrosity. He wants something, he figures out how to get it, he gets it. No guilt, no doubt, no time wasted wondering what people will think of him. He just moves.

I’m not saying I want to be like that. But I watch him work and there’s something clear about it. He’s decided his conscience is a liability and he’s shed it, so the world becomes just a puzzle to solve. And he solves it. Repeatedly. That’s probably what makes him a villain. It’s also what makes it impossible to look away.

South Park created something genius by making their most awful character also completely committed to what he wants. He’s terrible, but terrible in a way that works. There’s something hypnotic about that kind of commitment. Especially when it’s horrible.