Paris Hasn’t Changed

Paris Hilton hasn’t changed since her tape came out in 2001. Same face, same body, same glassy eyes. The footage was barely even hot—mostly night vision and unconvincing moans—but everyone wanted it. I remember getting a burned copy from someone’s older brother back when that’s how you got porn, before it was all free and endless online.

She and Nicky showed up for a photo shoot with Terry Richardson at some point. Black bikini, her trademark blank stare, pictures that existed if you cared to look at them. She released ’Good Time’ with Lil Wayne around then, which was forgettable in every way. The tape is still her high point. Everything since has been a long, slow fade.