Marcel Winatschek

Glitter Where the Cum Would Be

Miley Cyrus hosted the 32nd MTV Video Music Awards, dropped a surprise album, and put a music video on YouTube—all in the same night. That’s the kind of maximalist chaos I genuinely respect.

The album is Miley & Her Dead Petz—streamable free on her site—and the first single, Dooo It!, is experimental in the way that politely suggests it might be unlistenable to some people. The video is a full-on colorful bukkake party, with glitter standing in for the obvious substitute. I watched it more than once.

Hannah Montana, The Tongue, whatever you want to call her—she’s back and I couldn’t be happier about it. I once publicly proposed to her on this journal and she had the grace to completely ignore me. That somehow makes me like her more. Anyone who isn’t at least a little bit delighted by Miley Cyrus is someone I simply cannot take seriously.