Midlife Crisis Outfit
As of today, I am 40 years old. So it’s about time to talk about my midlife crisis. Strictly speaking, I’ve been in it for four decades now, but in order to have a good starting point for today’s topic, let’s just assume that it’s reached its peak today.
My midlife crisis manifests itself internally through constant reflection, depression, and self-destructive tendencies and externally through continuous optimization of my, at least in my eyes, perfect outfit.
I am a great advocate of a single appearance. While normal people wear a different wardrobe every day, consisting of all kinds of colors, shapes, and brands, I have made it my mission to find the ideal piece of clothing for every part of my body. And, yes, I know that this behavior is the result of some error in my head. But let’s call it minimalism.
I quickly realized that the majority of my individual uniform had to be black. That way I don’t have to worry about any color combinations. Black always fits, looks good, and is also slimming. No other color has so many wins.
What’s more, my outfit has to be cheap, basic, and available everywhere. Even if, for whatever reason, I end up in Guatemala, I need to be able to go into town and replace a used item of clothing there.
That’s why I’ve chosen a few international companies whose products I use to present myself to the world. Of course, I always adapt this decision. After all, my outfit is alive. Like me. I’m not dead. Yet.
Most of my clothes are from H&M. Because the quality is good, the price is reasonable, and availability is guaranteed. One plus point is that the basics are not printed with logos. They are simple, modern, and have a good shape. I can also dye them if they are washed out.
So I’ve bought the same black pants, T-shirts, hoodies, sweaters, jackets, underpants, scarves, and gloves several times so that I can change them every day.
Of course, I can’t wear too many nameless basics, otherwise I have no character. That’s why my cap printed with the New York Yankees logo is from New Era. Because I wanted something American.
And since black only looks good with white accents, because otherwise you seem like a mortician, I’m wearing a pair of white Nike Air Force 1 with white Nike Everyday Cushioned Training Crew socks. Because it’s the default right now.
My outfit is rounded off with black Jisco glasses, a vintage Casio watch, and Apple AirPod Pros. Done. This is how stylish a midlife crisis can be. At least in my head.